I recently noticed that it has been 9 months since I graduated from Yoga teacher training. The time has literally flown by! Where do I even begin…? First off if you had told me that I would have been a yoga teacher at the beginning of last year I probably would have said, “yeaaa ok.”
When I decided to take yoga teacher training I initially wanted to deepen my physical but mostly my spiritual practice. I wasn’t closed to the idea of teaching but it was definitely not at the forefront of my mind.
"We all have our own path of learnings and experiences..."
I can honestly say it's been a journey full of learning experiences of mySelf. Guess what….I really enjoy teaching! More so than I thought I would.
Teaching has taught me a level of patience that only could come from teaching others. It’s like when teaching you have to be just as patient with yourself as well as your students (ah-ha moment). Being patient with myself is something that I have often had issues with. Now, I often think back to a saying I heard in yoga teacher training from one of my classmates that “we must assume that everyone is doing the best that they can.” We all have our own path of learnings and experiences of life that we deal with in our own time.
Yoga teacher training felt like it came at the right time in my life. My mentor would often tell me, “you are exactly where you are supposed to be.” I had been having feelings that it was time for me to go on this journey for a year or two. Oddly I told myself about 8 years ago that I would like to take the yoga teacher training but never really pursued it. And plainly put...it wasn’t time. I wasn’t ready. It was at the time, I decided to take teacher training, I felt I needed to go deeper inside and really understand who I was and why I was the way that I was.
"Sometimes you have to check your very own self!"
When the yoga teacher training opportunity presented itself I had been on this journey of studying and learning who I was for a little while. My mentor told me “the physical part of training would be a breeze. It’s the spiritual part is what is going to be the challenge.” “Yea ok….I get it…” I’m thinking casually. I knew that teacher training was not going to just be about teaching or even the physical practice of yoga, for me. It was going to be more emotional than anything. A deep emotional self-assessment that I needed to have for a very long time.
I saw and learned so many things about myself and who I was during the training. I was able to examined the relationship I had with myself very carefully. I saw things about myself that I had been totally blind to. Oh yes...I will be the first to admit there were first times of many where I was looking at myself like….really chic? Of course, those “becoming self-aware” moments are not always comfortable, fun, or even cute. But understanding that these moments must be experienced in order for growth to occur is and what was ammunition for me to keep pushing through.
What to expect?
No one can really explain or prepare you for what’s ahead in yoga teacher training. My emotions on some days were up and others were down. There would be days I would be on a yoga high like nobody's business! I would immerse myself in the knowledge and the physical practice. I mean I couldn’t get enough. I was very aware and made it a point to try and live in the moment and really take in and learn all I could from this experience.
And then there were days that were not so happy, and full of self-acknowledgement, self-forgiveness and then release of years and years of emotional "goo" blah blah blah. I felt brave for going through the process though. It was a hellava experience. One that I am happy I had and would do over again.
The mental practice:
YT training equipped me with tools that I use regularly. Developing the habit to meditate has been one of the best things I have learned to do for myself. In the past meditation was something that was and still is challenging for me. It took a huge effort and commitment from me to adapt to meditation. As a person who has dealt with anxiety in the past and at times, still do, meditation has become one tool that I use the most. One that is most beneficial to my mental and emotional well being. I can truly tell the difference in days I have not taken the time to meditate than the days that I have meditatted.
The physical practice:
The physical practice left me in amazing shape. I was sore from doing lots of yoga. But I loved every bit of it. I hadn’t felt that healthy, strong and fit in a long time. I was happy about the fact that I was pushing myself in a good way that I hadn’t push my body physically in a while.
The con:
Unfortunately, since I have started teaching my personal practice has taken a hit. Sure I practice at home. I can’t stress enough the importance of a home practice. But, I am not able to practice as much as I would like with my mentor/yoga teacher. I really value being able to go to his class and be led. It grounds me and keeps me in that student space of always learning and exploring.
The practice of yoga and meditation has me living mindfully. I am more aware of the present moment and try to live day to day as such. Don’t get me wrong...I still have my days where stress and anxiety are high. However, I am not in that space long.
Even though the teacher training experience ended, the journey has very much continued. One of the biggest lessons I have learned is not to take myself so seriously. It’s only yoga;)
Until next time,